rallying for Jesus

lately, upon chatting with friends i've noticed a strong desire deep within me to express my passions for certain topics, but finding a gentle tug at my heart steering me in a different direction.
i love research. There is no greater afternoon for me than one filled with gaining insight, usually via reading although sometimes through situations. While i was pregnant i read over ten books on midwifery, breastfeeding, postpartum, and attachment parenting. Like my eldest sister, i am becoming increasingly informed on carseat safety, and find that i want to scream from a mountain top with a megaphone that parents are ridiculous to take their chances when it comes to cars. But i know...something in me says-be edifying in your relationships, have grace. It is exceedingly challenging for me. And i have to handle it with kid gloves otherwise my tenacity can be bruising. It is by God's grace that the lion in me doesn't attack others for choosing different paths, options, etc.
at Mars Hill this last Sunday, Pastor Mark explained it this way: if you are a die hard democrat then you demonize republicans. Because we worship the things we are most passionate about. We take good things and make them god things. Little g- god things. And it struck Caleb and I. Even though i constantly have to remind myself that i only need to rally for the person and work of Jesus.
I shouldn't demonize women who don't breastfeed, or people who forward face their kids before the recommended age. I wish i could just not care. What it comes down to is my pride and imposed righteousness regarding those topics. Even if i did know more, or different points it is not going to show grace or point to Jesus.
Lord, i pray that i can be a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister and a friend who above all else, lives for your reputation.

conviction no more?

is it possible to go through seasons of conviction? During what has become weekly coffee and accountability with a friend i had to sheepishly discuss the fact that i reactivated one of my two former online networking sites. She told me that stepping away for a season may have been an adequate break, but to honestly evaluate my time spent, and how it can affect my thought life. And really, thus far, i don't feel like having facebook is a stumbling block...sure, there are some people on my friends list whom i have zero reason to foster a relationship with, but on the whole, the same pressing feeling isn't there as it was in February.

so, i have to assume, that as we are set free from certain burdens as we walk through life, that our convictions can and do change? I do want to continue to be prayerful around the matter, and respectful to Caleb because he isn't too keen on social networking. if i start to sense that having a profile completely about myself is getting in the way of where I want my identity to reside which is Jesus, than it's time for the account to go [again].

it's kind of embarrassing to present these struggles for all to see, but I guess one could call it accountability? ;)

that's all, short blog...i'm exhausted and Caleb just returned from hanging out with the guys so I want to go close out the day with him!

KBA